how true

I saw this on my good friend Berkleys blog today.

It is so true.

I love the fact that I do know that Heavenly Father knows who I am.

really.

especially when i forget.

:)

Also, I have learned recently that I certianly need Heavenly Fathers, and Christs daily awareness in my life, in order to be who I want to be.

I know they are aware of me, I just have to be actively seeking them.

truth be told. :)

real life update.

I'm sure most of you wouldn't believe what my life has consisted of this past week..

& I am sure that those of you who do know what it's consisted of have very real, and honest opinions. 

but with out dropping the deets, and without going over board, let me share with you a few things I have learned. And a few things I hope I can stay true to. 

1. Perhaps it is best to keep your goals, dreams, and ideas to yourself. It's not that other people are out to get you.. it's just that sometimes it's hard to believe in the extraordinary. It's hard to see that something besides the every day could still be possible. It's not a fault, it's just a forgotten truth. Instead, I hope I can keep my ambitions on the DL, thus when they do become reality.. everyone will benefit. :) And believe me, they WILL become a reality. 

2. God is good. And I think we, or at least I, under estimate his trust in us, me. I have been so overwhelmed with the opportunities that have been presented to me, and I owe it all to the plan of our Saviour. I am so humbled to know that he believes in me enough to pursue the task at hand. 

3. Often times when I kneel to pray I feel a begrudging feeling. How could I kneel to pray and ask for guidance and help, when I never listen to the offers already given to me? How could I kneel and think God will listen to me, when I don't listen to Him? How can I ask for His spirit to be with me, if I don't create a safe house for it to be carried? I don't know how.. but I do know that I still can. & that no matter what mistakes I made that day, or week, or that moment ago.. He'll still listen, and He'll still answer, and He'll still believe. Often times now I pray to have the negativity in my heart and mind to be released. This makes completing a prayer easier because I let myself loose of Satan's bands. I push through the grudges, and find the peace. 

4. A positive word goes a long way. And visa versa. Often times after I hear a negative opinion about something, I feel myself begin to carry that same feeling. I house it as if it was my own. Then when a topic arises in which a negative memory is triggered.. that memory is released. I have made myself a passer of the unhealthy & unattractive thoughts. I don't like that. I want to be a person who, despite everything, still has a positive thing to say about everyone, and everything. At the end of each day, I want to feel myself grow a little closer to the example of Jesus Christ. There in lies happiness. 

5. Sometimes a stake out with your best friend and a bean and cheese burrito is exactly what we need. 

6. It bothers me that answers to some of life's offerings... are pre-created. I think it is so important for each of us to push past our first initial thoughts, the thoughts that have some how embedded themselves within us, & search for what we truly think is right. I think it would surprise many people that what they truly think, is opposite of their already given opinion. We can't be afraid to be different. We can't be afraid to truly live on the bright side. We can't be afraid to answer life's questions with a thumbs up. 

This past week should have been challenging. It should have shaken me from the core, and rocked my whole world. I should feel overwhelmed, mis-guided, and scared. But you know what I feel instead? For the first time in quite awhile.. I feel inspired. I feel loved. I feel peace and contentment. I feel the drive and the passion to continue my life in such a way that others will truly be inspired by the way I have answered life's questions. 

I feel like I fell in love with an incredible man. I know that every day he offers me another reason to love him more. 

I feel like God believes in me, that He loves me. 

I feel driven to succeed. 

& perhaps the first time in forever.. I truly believe in myself. I know I can conquer the task at hand. 

Through humility, guidance, & love... we can do anything. :)

be thou an example.

This morning i witnessed J pausing to pray before he rode away on his motorcycle. 

 To see my big, hard working guy humbly bowing his head to ask or thank, or just talk to God before he began his day.. was a sweet moment. I love being able to see the good choices, and tender changes my handsome makes.

 Each of us, each day, can make a difference just by the example we set. Even if we don't feel ready to be an example. Sometimes just the strength we have to try try again, is the perfect step.

I love my example. :)

thankful thursday

1. I am thankful for the opportunities to learn and RE-learn lessons. I don't know what I would do without God's constant belief in me. 

...

2. I am thankful for emails from missionaries. I have lost contact with a lot of my dear friends since my move here, but I have been able to email a few. And their letters provide such a hope and love for me. Their letters are my personal treasure. 

...

3. I am thankful for the lesson I am learning that we can choose our emotions in every situation. Sometimes I get so caught up in a moment, and a surge of anger rushes through me.. but I know that if i take a step back I will be able feel a calmness from the spirit, and choose an option that will better the situation. "Never let a problem to be solved, become more important than a person to be loved."

...

4. I am thankful for all the amenities I have that bring goodness to my life. Films, the internet, books, music, people, etc. My life has been filled  and touched by so much goodness, and each time i take the opportunity to search it out, I am never disappointed. 

...

5. I am thankful for kindness. and for those who believe in it's true power. 

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6. I am thankful for the Christmas season. I know it isn't December, but I am a big believer on the Christmas spirit living within our hearts all year round. That goes for Santa lovers, and Baby Jesus lovers alike. Christmas is just too good to be only celebrated for 25 days at the end of the year. :)

...

7. I am thankful that my brothers and mother weren't in a fatal taxi wreck this weekend in NYC. Whatever the reason they weren't able to get on a flight.. I am so grateful they remained safe. I love them all so much.

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8. I am thankful for being able to discover my purpose here in China. 

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9. I am thankful that I am learning that I don't need a tag to be a missionary. I have had the wrong mind set for so long, though with good intentions. I hope I can change that, and become a missionary for Jesus Christ in my every day living. Missionary douche style. (inside joke.) :) 

...

10. I am thankful for the spirit. and its small and simple whispers. 

...

& bonus?

11. I am thankful that I had to re-write this list three times now. For some unknown reason blogger, my proxy, or fate, has deleted this post three times. But it has only instilled my gratitude for each of these things even more so. :)

Rescuing Others

The spirit of Christmas.

I don't have to wait till December. :)

answer this for me:

ACCORDING TO YOU what is the number one, all time, biggest, most important thing the church, or any other religion, teaches? and why?

I want to share my answer, but i don't want to alter the thoughts of others before hand. So before I talk about what I have come to know it is, please.. enlighten me with your thoughts. 

a man of faith

when i am at work people tell me i am a positive man,

i tell them i am a man of faith.

- Spanish member at the international branch

the back drop every sunday school slash sacrament room should have. 

quitting the church

In a local suburban newspaper in Provo, Utah, there has been an ongoing series of articles written by individuals who wanted to persuade LDS Church members to leave the Church. In response to these highly critical and spirited remarks, a local member wrote this rebuttal: 

To the Editor:

I have been thinking of quitting the Mormon Church. Yes, if I can, I am going to get even with that church. As soon as I can find another church that teaches about the Gathering of the House of Israel; the return of the Ten Tribes and their mission; the return of the Jews to Palestine and why, and how they are going to build the temple; the building of temples and what to do with them; the mission of Elias, the prophet, as predicted by Malachi; the method for the salvation of the people that died at the time of Noah in the flood; the origin of the American Indian; the complete explanation of why Jesus of Nazareth had to have a mortal mother but not a mortal father; the explanation of the three degrees of glory (three heavens) as mentioned by Paul; the complete explanation of why Elias and Moses did not die but had to be translated (since they both lived before the resurrection was introduced by Christ); the restoration of the gospel by modern revelation as promised by Peter and Paul and Jesus himself; the belief in eternal marriage and the family, and the knowledge and the place to seal for eternity; that teaches abstinence from all harmful drugs and foods ; and that sells the best fire insurance policy on earth, for the last days, for only a 10th of my income. Yes sir, as soon as I can find another church that teaches all that, or even half as much, I will say good-bye to this Mormon Church.

The church that I am looking for must also be able to motivate 50,000+ youth, and adults, for the first, second or third time, to leave their homes for two years at their own expense and go to far-away places to teach and preach without salary. It must be able to call, on a frosty day, some 5 or 6 thousand professors, students, lawyers, doctors, judges, policemen, businessmen, housewives and children to go and pick apples at 6 a.m. It must be able to call meetings and get the attention for two hours of more than 150,000 men. Yes, it must also teach and show why salvation is assured for children who die before eight years of age. 
Mr. Editor, could you help me find a church that teaches all that and more than hundreds of other doctrines and principles, which I have no room to mention here, and which brings solace and comfort to the soul; peace, hope, and salvation to mankind, and above all, that answers the key questions that all the great philosophers have asked; questions and answers that explain the meaning of life, the purpose of death, suffering and pain; the absolute need for a Redeemer and the marvellous plan conceived and executed by Jesus Christ the Saviour? 

Yes, as soon as I find another church that teaches that, and also that has the organization and the powers to make that teaching effective, I am going to quit the Mormon Church. For I should not tolerate that "they" should change a few words in the Book of Mormon-even if those changes simply improve the grammar and the syntax of the verses-for, after all, don't you think the Divine Church should employ angels as bookmakers, and clerks, to do all the chores on earth? Don't you think, Mr. Editor, that the Divine Church should also have prophets that don't get sick and don't get old and die, and certainly, that don't make a goof here and there. No, sir! A Divine Church should be so divine that only perfect people should belong to it, and only perfect people should run it. As a matter of fact, the Church should be so perfect that it should not even be here on earth!

So, I repeat, if any one of the kind readers of this imperfect letter knows about another church that teaches and does as much for mankind as the Mormon Church, please let me know. And please do it soon, because my turn to go to the cannery is coming up. Also, "they" want my last son (the fifth one) to go away for two years and again, I have to pay for all that. And I also know that they expect me to go to the farm to prune trees, and I have heard that our ward is going to be divided again, and it is our side that must build the new chapel. And also, someone the other day had the gall of suggesting that my wife and I get ready to go on a second mission, and when you come back, they said, you can volunteer as a temple worker. 

Boy, these Mormons don't leave you alone for a minute. And what do I get for all that, I asked? "Well," they said, "for one, you can look forward to a church funeral service at no charge!"

Do you think you can help me to find another church?

serve.

When feeling under the weather? serve.

When upset by someone or something? serve.

when truly missing someone? serve.

When wishing you are elsewhere? serve.

When you can't kick the habits? serve.

When you've layed down for one to many hours? serve.

when in the need to break the ice? Serve.

When you see something that needs to change? serve.

When pride resides within? serve.

when church is too far away for attendance? serve.

in all things? serve.

Recently i've been feeling oh so blue. i can't seem to kick this awful state i am in, and every day it seems to get progressivly worse. tonight however, after dinner instead of coming back up to the apartment and falling asleep Jennie and Jenna stopped to ask if they could help the couple at the bottom  of the stairs, cut jean strings. I found them each happy, and quickly joined in the service. It was amazing to me how much better i felt almost instantly. Though it was so simple, the results were so profound. I don't know how i can forget this so easily. Service, unselfish and thoughtful, is the best answer to almost any question. I am so grateful for the gospel, and it's constant reminder that service is the key.

one of my favorite quotes is from the Joseph Smith movie at the visitors center. JS is chopping wood for an old lady when she comes to thank him. She tells him she doesn't agree with his religion, but is grateful for his service, and his quick reply is, "Well ma'm, you might say that is our religion." I couldn't agree more. :)

I've also found myself saying that i wish we had an oven so i could make people cupcakes and what not.. and by saying and wishing this, i've realized that i've come to crack up service to a bake good. Though they are delightful, service is much more then a colourful tasty cupcake. It's the smile that took awhile to muster, the plop of a seat near the sad stranger, the ball thrown for a kid who needs a friend, or... a pair of scissors and the simple gesture of the will to help.

I hope i can seek out the opportunities of service God has given me while i am here. And I am so thankful for the constant reminders and examples i have around me. I may forget too easily, but I always wish to remember. That's gotta count for something, right? :)

Heavens eyes

Up only

a thousand years ago i was listening to one of my most beloved teaches in high school talk about a man he once knew. This particular man, my teacher knew as just a kid, but one day the kid changed. He saw a sign in the temple stair well that said, "Up only." Knowing it was meant for the stairs, he took it a different way. He made it his life motto. to go "up only." From the moment he looked at that sign, the kids life changed. And my teacher watched it change. the boy became nice to everyone he met. He beamed with joy as often as he could, he looked for the good in others, and he found the good in himself. he applied hard work to get where he wanted to go, and he never lost sight of that sign.

Years later my teacher stood in line at this mans wedding, waiting to shake his hand. When he did, the teacher told the man how impressive it was to watch him grow from such a young boy, to such an incredible man.. to this the man replied, I owe all my growth to the one up stairs.

he never stopped "going up."
& i have never forgotten that story. 

trying to be like Jesus

 The summer of my tenth grade year, I ended up loosing close to all of my friends. I was left feeling alone, hurt, and hating every part of myself for every reason i could think of. I began not to eat, and to run like a maniac. I never talked to anyone, and constantly had my ear phones in. & try as i might, i never found the peace i was looking for. I didn't understand how everything could have gone so wrong, so fast, without me even realizing it.

then one day my brilliant mother changed my life. I was having a particularly hard day and crying to her about how much sadness i carried with me and my wish to change. After listening silently and waiting for me to finish my out poor, she told me to do something that I will never forget. It was simple, but it impacted my life more then she will ever know.

My mother told me to go into my room and draw two lines on a piece of paper, creating three spaces. In one space I was to write all the characteristics i found in myself, in the other i was to write all the characteristics i found in Chirst, and in the last one the character traits i WANT to find in myself. I remember so vividly doing this project. (and i have the worst memory.) I remember looking at that finished peice of paper, and realizing just how far I had let myself fade from the person I was meant to be. After this project, I made a firm resolution to try to be like Jesus.

The affects of this goal, reached far greater then what i ever imagined they could. Eventually, I saw the affects not only in my own life, but in my loved ones. My friends, and fellow students, siblings, and parents. Because of the change I was willing and ready to make, I became a vessel.  I made sure that if someone knew me, they also knew Christ. I became the best person I could be, by simply following in His ways. I became happy, whole, and ready to work.

I realized the other day after a long talk with Jeremy that I was once again at the state of my tenth grade summer year. I once again had found myself so far off the path I know is mine to take. And I also knew, once again, that it was time to make that chart.

When I first got here, I made calanders with deadlines for goals, charts for keeping track of progress, little shrines of encouragment. Anything you can think of that may of had the slightest bit of help towards remembering and keeping my goals, i did it.

i thought it would help motivate me if i could see all my goals written down right in front of me. Broken down into tasks and steps. And a list of reasons why I was going to achieve them all.
But after talking with J, I realized that I was wanting for the wrong goals. If I want to be made into a whole person again, I must do it through the love of the Saviour; through His endless example.

My one true goal, the one thing I actually care most about achieving isn't loosing weight or getting rid of relief society arms. It isn't keeping a clean house, or trying to say five nice things to everyone i meet that day.

No, my one true goal is to "Be Like Him." To follow in His ways.

My one true goal is to try to be like Jesus.

so I tore down all those goals and charts and "encouraging" mantra's. & I left myself with white walls, a clean slate. The only thing i have hanging in my room now, is a  picture of my greatest role model, and a chart that I am hoping will once again make its miracle move in my life.

I love the Saviour. I have seen so many miracles happen in my life. For me, and my loved ones. Countless times I felt his presence with me, and countless times I have been brought to my knee's by the overwhelming knowledge of His love. I know with all of my heart that God loves me, and that His son loves me. The hand of God is never out of reach.. and when I find myself farther away from the door, I find Him knocking harder. I know He will not give up on me, and I will not give up on Him. He is my constant companion, and my greatest example. I am so incredibly blessed to have been born and raised in the Gospel of Jesus Christ. I can not thank my parents enough for rearing me in the direction I need to be going. Without the light of Christ in my life, who knows where I would be. I pray that I can one day make Him proud of me. I know He lives, and I know He loves us. There isn't a doubt in my mind.

not one.

we can always find happiness

A wise man

" To live with gratitude ever in our hearts is to touch heaven."
- President Thomas S. Monson

"Never let a problem to be solved become more important then a person to be loved."

Sunday afternoon

the little ladle lady and blue shirt couple are so so adorable. beautiful love. :)

Once I learned an important lesson from my wife. I traveled extensively in my profession. I had been gone almost two weeks and returned home one Saturday morning. I had four hours before I needed to attend another meeting. I noticed that our little washing machine had broken down and my wife was washing the clothes by hand. I began to fix the machine. Jeanene came by and said, “Rich, what are you doing?” I said, “I’m repairing the washing machine so you don’t have to do this by hand.” She said, “No. Go play with the children.” I said, “I can play with the children anytime. I want to help you.”Then she said, “Richard, please go play with the children.”When she spoke to me that authoritatively, I obeyed.

Express gratitude for what your spouse does for you. Express that love and gratitude often. That will make life far richer and more pleasant and purposeful. Don’t withhold those natural expressions of love. And it works a lot better if you are holding her close while you tell her.

“Jeanene, it is time to tell you I love you.”

Pure love is an incomparable, potent power for good. 

I know what it is to love a daughter of Father in Heaven who with grace and devotion lived the full feminine splendor of her righteous womanhood. I am confident that when, in our future, I see her again beyond the veil, we will recognize that we have become even more deeply in love. We will appreciate each other even more, having spent this time separated by the veil. In the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

 “Ye are not your own,” Paul says. “Ye [have been] bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God’s.” 


¹²In sexual transgression the soul is at stake—the body and the spirit.

But such a total union, such an unyielding commitment between a man and a woman, can only come with the proximity and permanence afforded in a marriage covenant, with solemn promises and the pledge of all they possess—their very hearts and minds, all their days and all their dreams.

If some few of you are carrying such wounds—and I know that you are—to you is extended the peace and renewal of repentance available through the atoning sacrifice of the Lord Jesus Christ. In such serious matters the path of repentance is not easily begun nor painlessly traveled. But the Savior of the world will walk that essential journey with you. He will strengthen you when you waver. He will be your light when it seems most dark. He will take your hand and be your hope when hope seems all you have left. His compassion and mercy, with all their cleansing and healing power, are freely given to all who truly wish complete forgiveness and will take the steps that lead to it.

I pray

As I write this I'm currently siting on a most beautiful look out a top a mountain island in hainan china.  

 I think God comes to places like this. To rest, and to ponder. I think he knows I am here. And is showing me what my soul should look and feel like.

 

Strong. Silent. Peaceful. Clear.

 


God belongs here. And i belong where he is. This is home. And I am so grateful. 

I pray in places like this. 

 Hainan island, Jadon's cabin balcony, Pine Valley lake, the front of a ferry on the Baltic sea, amid orange and red leaves in Sweden, in a quaint coffee house in Estonia, on Utah hill at night with Jeremy, and back home on top of Dixie rock all by myself.

Everyday I feel congested. 

Of thoughts, ideas, emotions, tasks. Too many faces, too many cars, too many tastes colors and words. 

Before I realize it I am spurtially swamped. Possessed by things and emotions. I sometimes feel like I have no control...

 And then I find myself in places like this. 

 Alone, on a perfectly windy out look. I see water and mountains in the far distance. I smell salt and fresh air. I hear silence. And I feel... Calm. 

 These places are home to me. They are a step out of the mundane into honest reality. They are true, and each one has become a piece of my heaven. 

 I am so grateful for this beautiful world, and for the opportunities to understand it. I am grateful for peace, humility, and fresh air. 

 I am truly blessed. 

It is better to look up!

"At the end of a particularly tiring day toward the end of my first week as a General Authority, my briefcase was overloaded and my mind was preoccupied with the question  "How can I possibly do this?" I left the office of the Seventy and entered the elevator of the Church Administration Building. As the elevator descended, my head was down and I stared blankly at the floor.
The door opened and someone entered, but i didn't look up. As soon as the door closed, I heard someone ask, "What are you looking at down there?" I recognized that voice, it was President Thomas S. Monson.
I quickly looked up and responded, "Oh, nothing." But he had seen my subdued countenance and my heavy briefcase. He smiled and lovingly suggested, while pointing heavenward, "It is better to look up!" 

Back on track

In Russia, I got working on some pretty serious goals and commitments. I was reading my scriptures, (first time finishing a book!) i studied conference talks, read uplifting books, prayed more then twice a day, and strengthened a lot of friendship and family bonds.

I felt so in tune, and so strong spiritually. I was pleased with who I was becoming, and the way I was making a difference in the lives of the ones I loved, or was learning to love. But after coming home, a lot of things changed for me. Unfortunately, I let my heart turn bitter towards someone I thought I loved.. and let that effect all the other areas in my life. I was angry with how things had turned out, and took it out on the most important person in my life, Christ. I let myself forget my habits and goals, and faulterd. I ended up so off course, I found myself in places and situations i never thought I would be in. I lost sight of so much.

Eventually, my mom had enough of this, and called me over to talk. She shared spiritual experiences that her and I have had, reminded me of some of my more personal ones, showed me Elder Uchtdorf's life changing talk "Forget me not.", and then told me something I will never forget. She said, "Kiri, you LOVE the Gospel." And, even though I was so far down in this self deprecating hole.. I knew she was right, because I started to smile.

I DO love the Gospel. I love the way it strengthens and changes lives. I love the wisdom the leaders of our church hold, and I love the love everyone strives to obtain and to give. And, once again as I find myself away from distractions, I have been able to reestablish the old goals that strengthened my testimony. I can still do better.. but I'm giving myself a pat on the back for what I have done since arriving. :)

Most recently I have been reading the General Conference talks given in October of last year. Unfortunately this copy isn't mine so my awesome highlighting skills can't be put to work.. which means almost everything that i liked, will probably end up on here so that i can re-read them whenever I need. So, I hope I don't drown out your feeds, or your eyes with my copying and pasting.. but i do promise you that if you take the time to read at least one or two of them, you'll pick up something great. :)

Charity in China

last night i was talking with my good friend Hams about Change, and Charity, and the change charity brings to lost souls. Including our own. We talked a bit about how off track we personally felt, and a bit about how to get back on. This morning she sent me a link to a General Conference talk given by Silvia H. Allred. (an awesome awesome lady.) This particular talk is entitled Charity Never Faileth.

In the talk, she gives and repeats so much wonderful council about one of the most important attributes we can obtain; the pure love of Christ. Highlighted in the beginning she says, "Plead for a desire to be filled with the gift of charity, the pure love of Christ."  


advice i truly needed. 

She then quotes, " Charity suffereth long, and is kind; Charity envieth not, charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up. It seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked & thinketh no evil. Rejoices not in iniquity but in truth. Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, and edurath all things.  CHARITY NEVER FAILS." 

While reading these particular words i was filled with such a desire to "enlarge my soul towards others." A desire to glow with a light that is shared with none other then the creator of light itself. A desire not to nap when I got home from school, but instead to play ball with little boys down stairs. A desire to help the little old ladies down stairs sew the thousands of jeans they care for, and a desire to teach the girls at the bra store English, instead of watch FRIENDS in my apartment. A desire to become better, and walk taller. A desire for change towards charity. 

Sister Allred goes on in her talk to describe how one can obtain Charity. she says,  

increase in innocence and virtue. 

have a full desire to become Christ-like

pray with all energy of heart

read your scriptures 

minister to those around you and give special attention to those in need 

forgive.

extend brotherly love to all

be kind, compassionate, and generous

these things, are the things i want to be striving after. If i pray intently and honestly about finding opportunities to serve, i know my experience here in China will be priceless. 

Charity, is a state of being.

 a state of heart.

 Charity, is light. 

light is a funny word. it has so many meanings and implications.

not heavy.

illuminated.

simple.

understanding.

and even, fire.

light.

i was light once. i weighed little, because my soul was not darkened. I was light from the inside out, because i had an understanding. I was a simple being of fire. 

 As much of you know, and many of you will soon find out.. i have a spiritual soul complex, if you will. I'm always feeling topsy turvey when it comes to being on the right track.. yet completely pulled and lured and yanked into the right direction. Never am i satisfied with where and who i am, and very rarely will you see me enjoying the complete entity of my life. And unfortunately as of lately, i have been completely off my marker and have found myself in the middle of east Jesus no where... spiritually that is. (or i guess physically works too.. who knows where Zhongshan is anyway? haha)  I still have personal walls to bring down, friendship bridges to rebuild, and spiritual mountains to climb before i can really make any sort of an impact, on myself or others, but at least i am on my way. On the path of forgiveness, change, and virtue. It's a much cleaner route, and a much more rewarding one, i can tell you this already. 

Charity as the power to purify.

President Monson says on this subject, " “Charity is having patience with someone who has let us down. It is resisting the impulse to become offended easily. It is accepting weaknesses and shortcomings. It is accepting people as they truly are. It is looking beyond physical appearances to attributes that will not dim through time. It is resisting the impulse to categorize others.”¹³

i view this as a personal statement as well. If i TRULY want to make a difference here, i must start to have patience with myself. Even though time and time again, i have let myself down, i must resist the impulse to be offended and to offend. I have to accept my weaknesses and shortcomings. I have to realize where and who i am now.. and accept that. I must look beyond the physical things i hate about myself, and focus more on the things that truly matter. and I can no longer categorize myself as a failure. 

Because, because of Charity, none of these things really matter. 

What matters is that we ALL have the ability and divine right, to become as great as Christ. 

to become like Him. 

Charity.  never. Faileth.