I've certainly hit my wall here in China. & i don't mean the great wall.
I'm to the point where i wake up in the morning, groan, and roll over.
i look at the calender and let a big ugly sigh come from the bottom of my stomach.
three. more. months.
you know, I didn't think I would hit my wall here. I have truly been enjoying myself. Yes, there have been majour ups and downs but for the long run, it's been splendid. But the thought of doing this same thing for the next three months has really gotten me down, and i can't seem to pull out of it. I am over it, ready for something different. ANYTHING different.
It certainly is a different world living with four girls under the same roof day in and day out. Going to the same places together, hearing the same stories over and over. There seems to be no way out. I think this is the hardest part of being here. Each girl i am living with is great, of course, but that doesn't make it easy. With girls.. there is some sort of cautionary line we always seem to be prancing over. Making sure no ones feels get too hurt, for no apparent reason. For us here in Dachong.. that line has become a mountain. It has gotten to the point where people think you are mad if you walk faster then them, have you door closed for too long, look the opposite way as them, say four words instead of five, comment on their hair instead of their shoes.. it's really really bad. And I can feel all weight of it. It's drowning me. for lack of better words, it just flat our sucks.
I could go on and on about how things need to be different, and how hard it is.. but i figure if i start, i'll never stop. point is, I'm tired of it all.
and i really mean it when i say, all.
I'm to the point where i wake up in the morning, groan, and roll over.
i look at the calender and let a big ugly sigh come from the bottom of my stomach.
three. more. months.
you know, I didn't think I would hit my wall here. I have truly been enjoying myself. Yes, there have been majour ups and downs but for the long run, it's been splendid. But the thought of doing this same thing for the next three months has really gotten me down, and i can't seem to pull out of it. I am over it, ready for something different. ANYTHING different.
It certainly is a different world living with four girls under the same roof day in and day out. Going to the same places together, hearing the same stories over and over. There seems to be no way out. I think this is the hardest part of being here. Each girl i am living with is great, of course, but that doesn't make it easy. With girls.. there is some sort of cautionary line we always seem to be prancing over. Making sure no ones feels get too hurt, for no apparent reason. For us here in Dachong.. that line has become a mountain. It has gotten to the point where people think you are mad if you walk faster then them, have you door closed for too long, look the opposite way as them, say four words instead of five, comment on their hair instead of their shoes.. it's really really bad. And I can feel all weight of it. It's drowning me. for lack of better words, it just flat our sucks.
I could go on and on about how things need to be different, and how hard it is.. but i figure if i start, i'll never stop. point is, I'm tired of it all.
and i really mean it when i say, all.
